The Vongola's Craziness!
by TheoneswhohidebehindshadowS
Summary: The Vongola have only gotten crazier over ten years! Series of One shots.
1. Hibird! Stay with us!

Ciaossu minna-san!

A/N: My name is Shadow-chan. I share this FF account with my friend, Ramen-chan. (More info? See our bio.) This is my FIRST story. This is a oneshot about Tsuna and co. TYL. I might continue depending on reviews. If I do continue, then some parts of the story may be connected. If so, I'll let you know. I can take criticism. Flame if you want, I will just say, "F**k off b***hes…" (Yes, I use *s to censor curse words, I'm only 14.) So this is probably a T fic…? I might change it depending on reviews. So you guys choose… ehehehe… I'm not very good at this. I'm new to this, so PLEASE READ AND REVIEW… My writing and grammar is that of a 2 year old. Tell me what I can work on, so I can work on it. Here goes nothing…

Disclaimer: I own nothing you might recognize in this fic. MAYBE minor OCs, but that is it.

Hibird, Stay With Us!

2nd POV: Hibird

In the Gardens

That one bird, it spread its wings, and soared into the unforgiving storm. It could see the lightning in the distance, but it didn't care. It soared straight ahead. Which bird is brave enough to do that?

Oh, wait.

It's Hibird.

And Hibird's aim was to sail into the unforgiving storm, Gokudera. Why, you ask? Well the unforgiving storm was giving a lecture to the aloof cloud for something along the lines of "Handing in your mission report on time." The cloud didn't seem like he was listening, but he looked annoyed, with a dark aura surrounding his very being. Hibird agreed with his master, he wanted the person, 'Dera… or something to stop annoying his master. Hibird's plan was to peck his cheek until he made it bleed. That would teach 'Dera to not mess with his master.

KHRxKHRxKHRXKHRxKHRxKHR

Normal POV

Still in the gardens.

Hibird was soaring towards Gokudera, with an…. angry? expression on his(?) face. It was weird. Anyways, Gokudera saw Hibird, and swatted it away like a fly. Hibird's persistence was incredibly high for a bird. So it kept one trying to fly around to find a spot he could attack. Gokudera had enough of this, so he decided to use the paperwork (for the Tuna) and swatted Hibird. Hibird fell to the ground as if he were a leaf. "Okay, so lesson rulebook pge #3,331, lesson # 40,067, getting your mission report on time to your boss…" Gokudera started, until he saw the prefect, Hibari's already pitch black aura, turn even darker… somehow. "Kami Korosu." was all he said. Without warning Hibari whipped out his tonfas, and rushed at Gokudera, aka, bird-killing herbivore.

Gokudera whipped out his bombs from his belt, equipped his "G's bow", and opened Uri's box. Out came Uri, who jumped on Gokudera's face and started scratching. Hibari didn't stand around and watch, he started beating Gokudera up too. So he and Uri were teaming up to beat up (aka KILL) Gokudera.

Watching the whole scene playing in front of him, the lightning, aka Lambo, decided to get lawn-head to heal Hibird, and MAYBE save Gokudera, but only because he was bored.

KHRxKHRxKHRXKHRxKHRxKHR

Normal POV

In the Mansion

Lambo took a deep breath and- "RYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHEEEEI! AHODERA IS GONNA DIE CAUSE OF HIS CAT AND A NAMIMORI LOVING OTAKU~!"-did that. Lambo's voice echoed throughout the hallway.

"KYOKUGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN!(x10000000) FINALLY, SOME PEOPLE TO HEAL!" Ryohei EXTREMELY said.

"Actually, it's one body infused with bombs, and a head prefect's bird." Lambo stated. Ryohei replied with another extreme, 'extreme'.

KHRxKHRxKHRXKHRxKHRxKHR

Normal POV

IN the Gardens, again

"Hibari has lost his sanity. The world is gonna end….~~" Lambo whined. Ryohei nodded in agreement. "Hibari's lost his sanity for too long; the only way to bring him back is to… let Sawada ice him up…" Ryohei mused. He turned his head for confirmation from the youngest guardian. Lambo nodded his head in agreement. "Let's go to his office."

KHRxKHRxKHRXKHRxKHRxKHR

Normal POV

Tsuna's Office

Knock knock.

"Who's there." A deep voice resounded from the room.

"Ryohei n' Lambo."

"'Ryohei n' Lambo who?"

"Sawada, let us in. This is extremely important." Ryohei didn't even emphasize his "extreme", so Tsuna knew it was seriously serious.

"Okay, come in."

Ryohei opened the wooden doors to reveal paperwork stacking so much, it touched the ceiling, and it was stacked in 50 rows behind the deicimo's mahogany desk, and the deicimo himself. Books, souviners, and letters were neatly stacked on the sides of the walls. Things like picture frames, and PAPERWORK decorated the decimo's desk.

"Did Yamamoto destroy the Southern end of the mansion by watching Swort Art Online again and practicing Kirito's attacks again?" Tsuna asked with a pokerface.

"…" Ryohei and Lambo could barely hold in their laugh. "Sawada… this is no….*snicker*... time to be making… jokes…" Ryohei managed to say in between laughs.

"What are you talking about?" Tsuna asked, clearly confused.

"Nothing, Gokudera is getting beat up as we speak by Hibari because Hibari thought that Gokudera killed him, while he only broke his wing, the healers are working on Hibird as we speak. I think you know know what you have to do." Ryohei explained.

"Hai, hai…" Tsuna sighed. "Let's go."

KHRxKHRxKHRXKHRxKHRxKHR

Normal POV

In the Gardens, AGAIN

"Zero Point Breakthrough: Revised" And the head prefect became enclosed in a pillar of ice, along with Uri, who disappeared in storm flames right after.

"ARRIGATOU JYUUDAIME!" Gokudera screamed, on the ground, not being able to move.

"Err… It's okay Gokudera-kun. The medics will take care of you." Tsuna said while sweatdropping, while the Vongola medics placed him on a streacher.

"Sawada, the medics have finished the operation with Hibird." Ryohei informed.

"Great, I'll show Hibari, Hibird and he might be calm." Tsuna said in a monotone voice. Tsuna used his flames to melt the ice. Hibari, with soaked clothes and hair, looked ready to kill someone until he saw Hibird fly on his shoulder. For one brief moment, his look softened, and then turned hard again.

"Kami Korosu. For trapping me in ice." Hibari stated. Boy, this chase was going to be fun.

~Owari~

A/N: Whew, that took longer than I expected, now I know 1% of how you feel, fellow writers! *salutes* R&amp;R! Tell me if I should continue this as a drabble series.

Ciao!

~Shadow-chan


	2. Hyper Dying Will Mode Forever!

Ciaossu minna-san! (This is Shadow-chan speaking)  
A/N: A HUGE thanks to Huehue (a Guest) for reviewing! Just reading your comment made me so happy for the rest of the day! You don't know how much you made say 'thank you so much' to you! THANK YOU! Also thanks to those five people who faved/followed! You guys made my day too! You guys are the only reason (aside from Ramen-chan's nagging, and the fact that it is Tsuna's birthday today) I am continuing this story! So a HUGE thanks once again. So for this drabble, you need to know i had only one thing in mind: Primo was never seen (by the KHR lovers) in regular mode... We never saw him in an UNhyper dying will mode! So my brother was like, "That would be funny if Primo was cursed with HDWM for the rest of his life..." And then I'm like, "GREAT IDEA! (for a new FF story)" and then he was like, "wtf...?" So this fic, like the previous one is a Crack!fic. R&amp;R PLEASE, I need to know how good/okay/bad/youre-the-worst-writer-on-this-planet I'm doing! On with the story!

Start time: October 14, 2014 at 4:37pm

Disclaimer: Mou... Do I have to do this every time? It saddens me that I DON'T own Katekyo Hitman Reborn! Akira Amano-san does. It's actually better off that way... but still!

* * *

Hyper Dying Will Mode For The Rest Of My Life?!

Tsuna's Bedroom

Tsuna's POV

I woke up quite... peacefully.

Usually, everyone wakes up normally. But not me, not when you share the same mansion with people who fight all the time, scream all the time, cry all the time, try to kill you all the time. That's my life style. My name is Sawada Tsunayoshi. I am 19 years old, and have been for one year and is currently the boss of the _Vongola Famiglia. _You (probably) guessed right, the _Vongola Famiglia _is currently the most influentual family in the world (1).

Anyway, as you can see, it was quite strange for me to wake up without a sadistic, spartan tutor using a defibrillator on you. I got out of bed, slowly, just to see if this was a test, but my Hyper Intuition wasn't telling me anything was wrong. I dressed in a formal attire. Black blazer, orange dress shirt, to represent my position, and black pants. My Hyper Intuition still wasn't pulling at anything. Did my family get kidnapped overnight? No, that's impossible, my Hyper Intuition would've woken me up long before the said kidnapper(s) did anything. And plus, my guardians would never let anything happen to themselves, and the mansion.

Scratch that.

They don't care less about what happens to the mansion, they only care about themselves, and a few select people. That's how it is in the Mafia. Even so, they mess up the mansion so much, my office is almost ALWAYS full of paperwork, repair bills, and medical bills for the unfortunate maids, chefs, and/or butlers caught in the middle of the mayhem.

Wait.

My Intuition's got something! It says something about something **special** (obvious foreshadow) is happening today. I walked down to my office, which is, conveniently, across the hallway. Passerby maids and butlers bowed to me, and said something I couldn't quite hear. I passed it off as something like, "Have a good day, Decimo." When I opened the door, my guardians, most of the maids and butlers, the Millfiore, the Giglionero, the Varia, the Shimon, the Arcobleno, including Reborn, my parents, Nono, and even Checkerface and whatever his assistant's name is (2) bowed to me and said in perfect synchronization, "Happy Birthday, tenth!"

Wow. I should be ashamed of myself for not noticing it was my birthday.

"Thank you, thank you, wow I didn't even realize it was my birthday today, I should be ashamed of myself!" I replied.

"You just work too much, that's all." Reborn simply replied while smirking.

"I've ordered everyone here to do anything and everything you say, tenth." Uni added. Everyone but Gokudera grumbled.

"Okay, let's try this out... Hibari, I order you to not fight with Mukuro all day and visa versa." I tried.

"Whatever you say, tenth." Lambo replied.

"Hn. / Kufufufu" Mukuro and Hibari said, staring eachother down.

I had so much fun today, partying, and giving orders, that I didn't even realize my intuition was nagging me the whole time.

* * *

Tsuna's Bedroom

Normal POV

Tsuna put on his night clothes and crawled into the into the huge, comfy bed. Everyday, he looked forward to this moment everyday. But now he knows, what's going to happen in his dream, he doesn't want to go to sleep.

Sleep started getting to him, and he closed his eyes as everything began to disappear around him. That made him shoot his eyes open, and become wide awake in suspicion. Instead of his room, he was sleeping in a bed of flowers, surrounded by a meadow, and no, he was NOT in a coffin. Tsuna sat up, stood up, dusted himself off, and looked around. He couldn't see anythings past the rounded earth, or whatever he was on. Until Primo 'ghosted' in front of him, as if his attribute was mist. "P-P-Primo!" Tsuna stuttered, something he hadn't done in a long time.

"Decimo, I see that you are now 20 years old." Primo stated.

"Hai... I turned 20 today," Tsuna replied.

"I see, in that case, I am sorry." Primo shifted his eyes to anywhere but Tsuna's eyes.

"What for, Primo?" The Decimo questioned.

"Well, you see, our family tree is a LONG list of sky flame users. Every five generations, the child who is our descendant, can't get OUT of Hyper Dying Will Mode once they reach 20. It has some benefits, like always being alert, and never showing your 'dame' side. At the same time, you can't laugh, or make jokes, all you can do that are close, is smirk. And I'm sorry to tell you that you are one of the children bearing this curse." Primo was still not trying to meet his gaze.

"... WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?! YOU MEAN I CAN NEVER LAUGH WITH MY FRIENDS AGAIN? THIS IS TRAGIC!" It took Tsuna and couple of seconds to realize what had befallen him. The space started to break. The flowers withered, the sky turned a dark red, and the sun turned white like the glistening moon.

"Looks like you'll be waking up soon." Primo stated.

"So this has been nothing but a dream?" Tsuna asked hopefully.

"No, it's just that you will find out what it's like to be in Hyper Dying Will Mode all the time, bye." Primo still didn't meet his gaze as he disappeared.

* * *

Tsuna's Bedroom

Normal POV

Tsuna woke up sweating and panting as he found all his friends surrounding him.

He got a headache as his friends started asking him what had happened, why he was in HDWM, and if he had a fever. His head started pounding, and ringing. Which hurt... A LOT. He looked like he was about to faint until Uni blurted, "EVERYBODY, CAN'T YOU SEE THAT TSUNA-KUN DOESN'T WANT PEOPLE ASKING HIM QUESTIONS? JUST LOOK AT HIM, HE LOOKS LIKE HE'S ABOUT TO FAINT! EVERYBODY BUT ME AND BYAKURAN-SAN WILL GO. WE ARE PART OF THE SKY TRINISETTE, SO WE WILL UNDERSTAND HIM. SO ALL OF YOU OUT, OUT, O-U-T!" Everyone stared in shock at Uni as they left the room. They never knew Uni could be so commanding, bossy, and LOUD.

"Uni-chan, I think you made him even more sick. But why is he in Hyper Dying Will Mode?" Byakuran aksed nobody in paticular.

"You guys do know that I'm awake right? And I think the fever is from the stress of my dream. And the reason why I'm in Hyper Dying Will Mode is because... is this room sound-proof? I don't want everyone barging in here after they hear about the reason..." Tsuna replied groggily.

"Yes, go on..."Uni urged.

Tsuna told them everything, and they listened intently, nodding their heads, and never interrupted. Or at least Uni, because Byakuran asked after he finished, "What? Can you repeat that?"

Uni quickly asked Ryohei, who along with everyone else,was standing with their ear on Decimo's door, to heal Tsuna, so he could be deprived of the fever. She also told them she would only tell them what happened AFTER Tsuna got cured and was sleeping. Then she dragged Byakuran by the ear to the Decimo's office (which was also sound-proofed) and told him about what happened.

* * *

The Living Room

Normal POV

"... and that's what happened." Uni just finished telling them what happened, and Tsuna was fever-deprived, and sleeping.

"That's tragic." Lambo simply stated.

"NO SH*T, AHOSHI! JYUUDAIME! DAIJOUBU?" Gokudera asked as if he was Tsuna's mother when Tsuna walked down the stairs.

"Yeah, Uni, did you tell them?" Tsuna replied and asked.

"Yeah." Uni replied.

"Good. I don't have to explain myself again," Tsuna sighed in relief. "oh yeah, Enma, Primo told me that when your 20th birthday comes (3), you will be facing the same thing."

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?" Enma cried in shock.

"I'm just kidding, relax," Tsuna replied. He suddenly starting a coughing fit, that wouldn't stop. Soon enough, he started coughing up blood. Tsuna got immidiate medical attention from his Sun guardian.

The last thing he thought before he passed out was, 'Damn, can't even make a joke without almost dying, damn it Primo.'

Somewhere, in Tsuna's modifies Vongola Ring, Primo sneezed, "Someone is talking about me..."

~Owarii~

* * *

A/N:

(1)- Idk, is it really the whole WORLD?

(2)-Can anyone tell me his name?

(3)- Idk if Enma's birthday if before or after Tsuna's birthday, so I said it was after.

End time: October 14, 2014 6:32pm

A/N: As you can see, I'm not very fast at typing, so yeah... I'm really tired from all the typing. (Other authors: Pshh... you think that tiring?) So I am gonna cut this a/n short. Please R&amp;R. Tell me if I did any mistakes, grammatical errors... blah, blah, blah...

Beta'd by Ramen-chan!

Ciao!


	3. Cold Days

Ciaossu! Minna-san!  
A/N: I know, I know... I was a b*** last chapter. For putting the Italian translations at the bottom of the page, instead of putting a key, or putting the translations in italics... But, I saw one author do that, and when I realized that author was being a b***, it was too late... forgive me please! I'll fix that after i post this chapter. This story was actually the first story I did on my phone! So i'll get to see how that works out. This oneshot is actually a 1YL story, so keep that in mind. There might be some OOCness. And keep in mind, I was FREEZING when I wrote the story, because the heater won't work, and it's 66 degrees in here, and even less degrees outside. So yeah, just IMAGINE my PAIN! Anyways, keep calm, and enjoy!  
Disclaimer: I do not own KHR, it belongs to Akria Amano-sensei! And, boy, what a great job she did!

* * *

Cold Days

* * *

Scarves, jackets, gloves, boots, jeans... This is what Namimori Middle School was in the winter of 20XX. School was cancelled for the day because of the cold. The snow kept falling lightly and steadily to the ground. A pale hand reached out to catch some snowflakes and see them melt into little bits of water droplets onto his hand. This boy's name was Tsunayoshi Sawada. Also known as (by his classmates) Dame-Tsuna, and (by the mafia) Vongola Decimo.

"There was nothing wrong with him going outside. A lot of kids go outside and play in the snow. But this was strange. The boy wasn't wearing anything warm! No scarf. No gloves. No jeans. Nothing! He was wearing his orange t-shirt with a blocky, red "27" in the middle with black shorts. He was walking to the grocery store to get some groceries for his mom, upon his sadistic-spartan tutor's request, of course. Which always annoyed him to no end. Reborn got every say in his life.

Of course, there were upsides. He got friends who he could trust and rely on. He also found out why he always had this nagging feeling in his head when he was doing something wrong, or something bad was about to happen. Hyper Intuition. From his Vongola bloodline. Speaking of his Hyper Intuition...It was nagging him. And giving him a splitting headache. He tried not to show it while walking on the street. He did a pretty good job at concealing his feelings. But the people around him were not realizing his expression. They noticed his lack of WARM clothes. And how he was not shivering. People turned and whispered.

"Is he in poverty or something?"

"Idiot. How does that explain how he isn't shivering?"

"He could be just plain used to the cold."

"That isn't possible, idiot!"

Tsuna ignored all the whispers and insults he was getting. His bullies showed up. Perfect timing.

"Look, Dame-Tsuna is trying to kill himself by dying from the cold!" Bully number one roared in laughter.

"The world would be better off without him!" Bully number two sneered.  
Ignore. Ignore. Ignore. They are innocent civilians that don't need to be dragged into the mafia like I was. Tsuna tried to calm himself. He tried to maneuver his way past them, but the bullies stood in his way.

"Look, Dame-Tsuna's trying to be tough today! Well, we are not letting you through until we are satisfied with beating you up! Hey, think of it this way, you'll be dead a lot faster!" Bully number theee cracked his knuckles.

_Shi*! They're going to find out!_ Tsuna panicked in his head. Bully number three's fist came to a sudden halt when it touched Tsuna's skin. It jerked back suddenly revealing black, 3rd degree burns on his fingers and knuckles. He screeched. Like a little girl. Tsuna was trying so hard not to laugh. Tsuna dashed to the nearest restaurant and food selling shop. Which happened to be Takesushi!

"Yo, Tsuna! What happened?" Yamamoto greeted and asked. Tsuna was laughing on the floor.

"Hey Yamamoto... you know... my three main bullies?" Tsuna asked in between small giggles.  
With that sentence, Yamamoto's eyes aura, and expression darkened to a pitch black color.

"Yes... I do..." Yamamoto darkly stated.

"I ran into them today on my way to your shop, and they tried to beat me up! When this one guys punched me, my skin was already heated up because of my sky flame attribute, and he burned the back of his fingers and his knuckles! It was so funny how he screamed! It was like Lambo's, but in a higher pitch!" With that said, Tsuna and Yamamoto went into full-blown laughter.

"At least they got a little bit of what's going to come to them...!" Yamamoto stated darkly after he stopped laughing.

"Yamamoto, you're sounding worse than Gokudera-kun!" Tsuna whined.

"Anyways, ill get you your groceries, and ill walk with you home, your really warm for a winter day like this!" Yamamoto quickly said whilst changing the subject. Tsuna sighed.

"Okay, be quick though, my mom's expecting me." Tsuna called after him.  
Yamamoto came back, one minute flat with groceries overflowing in his arms. Tsuna sweatdropped. "Do you want some help with that?" Tsuna asked.

"Let's go!" Yamamoto exclaimed and ignored, hovering over Tsuna. "Hai, hai..." Tsuna sweatdropped.

Right after the duo exited Takesushi, they heard a loud..."KYOKUGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!" Ryohei extremely screeched. Tsuna swore he lost, like, one fourth of his hearing every time he heard that. But he was used to it, nothing to worry about losing hearing, right? "SAWADA! WHY ARE YOU EXTREMELY NOT WEARING ANY WARM CLOTHES, YOU WILL DIE FROM THE COLD!" Ryohei extremely said (read: screamed).

"Oni-san, calm down. Its another attribute of the sky flame! It warms you up right to the core! Literally!" Tsuna explained.

"MAY I EXTREMELY ACCOMPANY YOU? I AM EXTREMELY COLD!" Ryohei questioned and screamed at the same time.

"Sure Oni-san!" Tsuna said brightly, which already warmed him up to the core with a smile that put his flame to shame. (A/N: The world is ending, I rhymed).

The trio continued walking until Lambo came falling from the sky. Tsuna caught him and controlled the flames so it wouldn't burn his younger bother. "Lambo, are you okay? What happened?" Tsuna asked the youngest guardian, Lambo.

"Tsu-Tsuna-nii! Re-reborn kicked me out of the house and said I needed to excersize!" Lambo wailed.

"Jeez, Reborn... Lambo? Do you want to walk with us? I'll make sure you stay nice and warm.

"O-okay, Tsuna-nii..." Lambo calmed down and sniffed. Lambo surprisingly matured in one year and looked up to Tsuna as a role model. And a good role model he was.

Again they started walking, aside from Tsuna holding Lambo like a teddy bear.  
"Herbivore, I will be willing to pass this chance up to bite you to death for crowding if you share some warmth." Yes, this was the new Hibari Kyouya, he became more open with Tsuna, but nobody else.

"Okay, Hibari-san."

Hibari was a man of little words. But when his tonfas smashed into your face and body, you could really feel the emotion of loneliness and coldness behind them. Ever since he was involved in the mafia with Tsuna and the other guardians, the loneliness and coldness turned neutral.

The five began walking again. Across the street, Tsuna saw a girl collapse, probably from the cold, as he crossed the street to get a closer look. He saw that the girl was not a stranger. The said girl was Chrome! Tsuna dashed the rest of the way across the street to Chrome and immediately, warmed her up. She cracked her eyes open to find her kind and caring boss encouraging her to keep warm. She noticed sky flames flowing in her veins. She was immediately warmed up. "Bossu? Can I stay at your house until the Vindice stop using Kokuyo Land as their base? I am not exactly welcomed with open arms."

"You can stay as long as you like, Chrome! I'll talk to Bermuda and Jager about their base placement!" Tsuna welcomed.

This is why Chrome followed her boss. He cared about everyone, even his enemies! Chrome will never stop following him. That's a vow she made to herself.

Tsuna, Yamamoto, Ryohei, Lambo, Hibari, and Chrome kept walking along the sidewalk, absorbing Tsuna's flames.

"Juudaime! Are these people harassing you? I'll blow them to bits if you want!" Gokudera showed up like an abrupt storm.

"Gokudera-kun! It's fine, I let them absorb my flames! Do you want to absorb some of mine?" Tsuna asked with a smile.

"Y-y-yes please... Juudaime." Gokudera shyly.

All of the Vongola guardians were gathered around their sky and all of them smiled and chatted with their boss.

On a certain rooftop, was a toddler with a suit, a fedora, and a green chameleon who changed into a green camera. "This will be a nice picture." He said softly.

* * *

~Owari~

* * *

A/N: That was shorter than expected. I felt like I was really repetitve during the whole thing. So correct me on any mistakes I may have made and PLEASE REVIEW! It keeps me writing! So, drop me a review, ne?

Ciao,  
Shadow-chan


	4. Memories: The UNFORGETABLE Climb

Ciaossu minna-san!

A/N: A HUGE thanks to Daaaw (a guest) and Luna D. Trinity for reviewing! I had so much sparkles that I died of the happiness, then came back to life to make this story! Seriously though! Your reviews make my day! So THANK YOU! To Luna-chan, thank you for that suggestion. It was only when your review pointed out that I had huge walls of text that I realized that I did single line spaces! I fixed it! So if you couldn't read it before, you can read it now! Yay! I don't know much about this, but I like to do my first author's note BEFORE I actually do the story. Last time was the first time I tried to do it AFTER I did the story. But I think I'll stick woth doing my first author's note BEFORE the story. Keep in mind, I had NO IDEA what I was going to do with this oneshot. I was really bored, I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE ANY HOMEWORK TO DO! THE WORLD IS ENDING! So...this one might not be very good... But next time, I'll come up something! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Katekyo Hitman Reborn! (And anything else you might recognize) Is not mine, has never been mine, and will never be mine... TT-TT, But then again, thats probably for the better!

* * *

Memories: The UNFORGETTABLE Climb

* * *

Vongola Decimo, was a man who was known for his forgiving nature, kind eyes, and his fearsome strength when he fought for something he thought was right. Inside his head now, and when he's not on a mission, he wants to tear his hair out for all the trouble and PAPERWORK his guardians cause. The stress level of when he finds 200 stacks of paperwork in the mornings, are off the chart, and into the sun. Thats. Not. Fun. His sadistic, spartan home tutor, Reborn, gets a kick out of it. To him, it's just like cheering him up when his mood's down.

"Juudaime? May I come in?" A husky (A/N: Get it? Since Hayato reminds us of a dog, he has a HUSKY voice? No? Ok... just ignore this..) voice politely asked.

"Yes you may." A deep, silky voice resounded from the room.

Hayato walked into the room with a pile of paperwork in his clutches. _Boom._ The sound of paper hitting a desk echoed throughout the hallway. That little action made Tsuna lose it. He rised from his chair only to walk toward the wall until he repeatedly started to bang his head against the wall. The first hit created a crater on the wall, as well as blood which dripped off his forehead. Each hit was two times harder than the last, soon, there was nothing for Tsuna to hit his head on.

Because the wall that was previously there disappeared into dust because of a certain Vongola Decimo.

Somewhere unknown to to anyone but himself, a ten year old wearing a black blazer with a yellow dress shirt and black long pants, and a black fedora with a silky yellow stripe running through the middle with a green shape shifting chameleon sitting on the one of the round corners, laughed his heart out. "Dame- Tsuna," Reborn whispered to himself, "that's going to cause you a ton of paperwork tomorrow." Reborn chuckled darkly and slipped into the shadows before you could say "_Arcobaleno_".

"J-J-Juudaime... Are you ok-k-kay?" Gokudera stuttered.

Tsuna didn't say anything. All he did was give an icy cold glare to the poor and unfortunate tree in front of him.

"Juudaime, I have a proposition..." Gokudera started.

"Go on, I'm listening." His eyes were so cold, that even the great prefect Namimori Middle School loving otaku, also known as, Hibari Kyouya, would shiver from just a mere glance.

"I say, you have too much stress on you ever since you took the position as Decimo. I propose that you take the week off, as us guardians finish the paperwork for the week." Gokudera insisted.

Tsuna's eyes and expression turned soft again. He smiled. "Thank you Hayato. Maybe this will teach them to behave." Tsuna wondered out loud as he left his office.

Whenever he wanted to relax, he loved to go to the garden. Before his parents died (1) when he was 17, his mom and dad always smelled like flowers. The garden made him relax and remember to remember to forgive. Today, he wanted to reminisce once upon a time when his sadistic spartan infant tutor made him climb up a mountain of all his physical fears chasing after him.

_"Reborn... Why do I have to do this?" Tsuna whined._

_"Becasue, Dame-Tsuna," Insert a kick to the head from the infant sent from hell and Tsuna withering in pain, "You have to learn to dive into your fears head-first. If you don't you'll die." Reborn stated calmly._

_"I'm pretty sure that's not how it-" Tsuna was interrupted by an uppercut that left him with a broken jaw and halfway up the mountain with snakes, clowns, lions, 'the Crooked Man', spiders the size of Jirou, and clones of.. REBORN chasing after him. Reborn was in a full out laughing fit when he saw clones of himself dig themselves out from the ground. He couldn't scream because of the broken jaw. He was pretty sure Reborn intended to break his jaw to make him silent when he would, characteristically, scream until his throat was raw and bleeding. Comical tears escaped comically from his comical eyes and comical face._

_"Dame-Tsuna! You have to remember to climb the mountain! Or else you'll be sent off to sea with nothing but rags and a small fishing boat!" Reborn shouted trough a microphone ten times louder than Squalo and Ryohei's loudest screams COMBINED. Tsuna clamped his ears shut so they wouldn't bleed._

_In a cave on the mountain, zombies, from the walking dead, emerged from the dark cave. As he hesitated to run as he PAINFULLY screamed, a poisonous snake bit the back of his calf. Tsuna screamed once again and excruciatingly ripped the snake off the back of his calf. Blood trickled from the two holes that were now ripped all the way down to his ankle._

_He tried to ignore the screaming pain as he ran away from the other threats to his life. If he was going to survive this, and be able to go back to his friends and family, he would have to start to climb up the mountain._

_He started to find natural hand and footholes in the solid and unstable rock. He could feel an icy cold hand with rotting flesh and dead skin rolling off the hand grab the tears in Tsuna's calf and ripped out the whole back of his calf. He started having uncontrolled twitching muscle movements, but managed to get to the nearest safe small rock ledge. So he can have a breather from the fears he had feared for most of his life. He felt the blood drip of the ledge and saw the coners of his vision fade.  
_

_He thought of his family._

_His friends._

_The people who would be devastated and disappointed that he would have died from mere training. There were no more big ledges. So the mountain was being merciful to him by not making him run anymore. After a trail of blood leading to the top, Reborn decided to intervene and take him to Ryohei because he wasn't much of a healer himself even though he had sun flames._

_"Juudime!"_

_"Tsuna!"_

_"Tsuna-kun!"_

_"Tsuna-san!_

_"Tsu-kun!"_

_"Tsunayoshi-kun!"_

_"Omnivore."_

_"Bossu!"_

_"Tsuna-nii!"_

_"Gyahaha! Did you fall Dame-Tsuna?"_

_Tsuna's Guardians and friends fretted when they saw Tsuna in a Leon stretcher._

_"Ryohei, heal the back of Tsuna's right calf. It's completely ripped out." Reborn ordered._

_Ryohei lifted up the Leon blanket that covered Tsuna's right calf just enough so only he could see it. "Reborn-san. It's already infected, and he's losing blood TOO fast. What did he do?" Ryohei worriedly searched the Arcobaleno's eyes for any answers._

_"That's not important right now! He'll tell you when he wakes up! Get to work on him!" Reborn shouted._

_"Yes, sir." Ryohei immediately got to work. Reborn smiled when his guardians sat in a circle facing outward to protect any threats coming to their boss, no, beloved, and treasured friend. You attracted some mighty fine guardians, Tsuna._

Tsuna sighed that was, what? Eight years ago? Long time, and it felt like yesterday. That day, for once, he read Reborn's mind on the edge of losing consiousness, and he was right. He did have guardians that are to be treasured.

* * *

~Owari~

* * *

A/N: That turned out less humorous and better than I expected! Sorry if you didn't like my horrible description, and/or bad explaining skills, and/or horrible grammar. But PLEASE REVIEW! Idc if it's criticism, or positive! So please drop a review, ne?

(1)- I decided to let Tsuna's parents be dead for this specific oneshot. They will be alive in future oneshots unless specified otherwise.

Ciao!

~Shadow-chan


	5. Lavinga's Piano

Ciaossu minna-san! This is Shadow-chan speaking!

GOMENASAI FOR THE LATE UPDATE! But here I am now presenting you with a(n) (probably small) update! A HUGE THANKS TO Yaaas! Thank you for reviewing (and getting my puns)! The best case scenario with a hoard of Reborns, is if you break every bone in your body, tear every muscle in your body, but no limbs missing... jeez... I hope you had a Happy Halloween too! Lol, it's too late now... Anyway, enjoy!

Disclaimer: *sniffs* I don't-I don't-I DON'T OWN KHR *full blown tantrum thrown by me*. (It's Akira amano-sensei's)

* * *

Lavina's Piano

* * *

Can you hear it?

The soft yet sweet melody of the piano. It's melody could bring tears to your eyes. In either laughter, or remembering a dear one that passed on. Each note told it's own story. It's own tale. Each of them combined into a life story. A melody so melancholy, yet, so sweet. Nobody can describe the notes from the piano, or rather, it's player. A melody that could've stopped Byakuran from taking over all worlds with only the purity of the melodic sound. Describing the sound, would be like describing what water tastes like. Anyone can describe the texture of water, yet cannot describe the taste. It's just like that with the piano. You can describe the piano's look, or it's owner's look, but you could never describe the sound.

A tuft of fluffy brown hair peeked its way into the room just barely. Then the narrowed eyes scanned the room. Then, faster than you could say "clam", the person made his way into the room, making the element of sound stand still like stone. The wonderful piano player was too deep into his own music to realize that he had just found himself a one person audience. The finish of the song, was like the death of the song. Like the end of the person's life story. But, it seemed like the sun came out as the last note bounced off the wall, and into the air, for all to hear, whether intentional, or unintentional.

Clap.

Clap.

Clap.

The music player jumped in his seat. His eyes widened like saucers. His jaw dropped open. "J-J-J-" He stuttered. He was so surprised, he couldn't say the first word that came to his head.

"Calm down Hayato... That was a beautiful piece! Why didn't you tell us that you can play the piano? You play so beautifully, I think 'Why didn't you share it with us, or the world? Please tell me, Hayato." Vongola Decimo calmly spoke.

The Decimo's voice made the piano player, now known as Hayato, feel like he could tell anyone anything, his voice was so welcoming, and warm. "Jyudaime, I-I-I well... Today's the day my mother died 16 years ago... I presume Bianchi told everyone...?" Hayato started.

"That's just about all she told us." Tsuna confirmed.

"My mother was only aloud to see me once a month, and when she did see me, she wasn't even aloud to tell me that she was my real mother because of my father's pride. When she did see me, she taught me how to play the piano. This song I was playing, was the last song she taught me..." At this, a tear slipped out from Hayato's eye.

"You should be happy. You should be happy that she taught you that song. She probably taught you it to remember her. You should be happy to have such a beautiful way of remembering your mother." The Decimo, also known as Tsuna, smiled. "Did you ever think of that? Instead of grieving, be happy! Of course you could grieve, but try and remember this, the people who have passed don't want anyone to spend their whole life crying when someone's already dead. That's something Primo told me in one of my dreams."

Hayato nodded, a sad smile plastered on his face. "I think you're right, Jyudaime." Hayato stated.

* * *

Suprisingly, everyone, including the misty people and the Namimori-otaku, all ate dinner in a comfortable silence, each of them occasionally stealing glances at Hayato.

During the dinner, a certain toddler Hitman with a black fedora with a golden line cutting through the middle, whispered to nobody in particular, "Tsuna, you've come far as a boss."

Unknown to even the Hitman, Tsuna heard and smirked, thanks to his Hyper Intuition. "Thanks." he whispered to anyone who was able to hear him.

~Owari~

* * *

A/N: That took shorter time than expected. Maybe it's because I got better at typing...? Probably not. But it was definately shorter than my previous work. But still, I want to think I'm getting better. I'm thinking about changing the title, because it's not ALL humor. So please give suggestions! So drop a review, ne?


	6. New Years!

Ciaossu (and Happy New Year!) Minna-san!

A/N: THANK YOU SO MUCH RanDoem! I can't believe someone would review on this story even though its collected so much dust and dirt. Oh man, when I found out that RanDeom reviewed on my story, I just had to continue. Yes I saw the review not even 5 minutes ago... I personally thought this story was really bad, and the writing was horrible. But, I had nothing but good reviews and a little critisism, which is perfectly fine, and I encourage you to do that! Thank you so much! And please, review, that's why I haven't updated in over a month. I lost motivation. Oh yeah, I didn't forget about the many follows and favorites! Woah so many! According to my standards anyway. I'm thinking of doing a small, tiny, miniscule, microscopic pairing. I don't like yaoi, but if any of you suggest something, then I will do a little fluff (straight only, sorry yaoi lovers!)paring on the side. It will only be fluff. This will be about New Years. Eventhoughitskindvelate. Sorry... Onward with the story!

Disclaimer: Not in any shape or form do I own KHR, it is Akira Amamo-sensei's. For some reason, I've been refusing to grow attached to any other anime excluding KHR... what's wrong with meeeeeee ~~?

* * *

A Vongola's New Year!

* * *

A slightly concerned man, wearing a suit, with a blue dress shirt, spiky hair, and a short scar marring his chin, cracked open the door to his boss's office ever so little, that not even the said boss's Hyper Intuition could catch it.

Okay, that was a lie.

Tsuna's Hyper Intuition could catch everything. And I mean everything. Although this time, he didn't catch the concerned Rain Guardian for a very foolish reason. That said reason is so foolish that at first glance, you would not see how the Neo Vongola Primo's Intuition didn't catch that. The reason is...

Paperwork.

Stupid, right?

If you lived inside one of the mansions for at least twenty-four hours, then you would realize it's not as stupid as it may seem. Tsuna's daily average of paperwork rounds to about 250 stacks. Then you realize why the boss would want to finish up the paperwork at an accelerated pace.

Back to the concerned Rain Guardian, Yamamoto Takeshi, Hayato asked politely...

Scratch THAT!

Screamed as an order, to give this stack of paperwork to the boss. He couldn't do it himself, because, well, let's say on this fateful day (like many others), a pineapple and an aloof cloud met their differences, and argued (read: fought an intense battle) INSIDE the Vongola mansion, and destroyed the right half. They are still brawling outside. In the forest. Poor forest. Hayato and the rest of the Guardians are trying to stop the Chaos, and no, Reborn was NOT there. (A/N: Get it?)

Once Takeshi saw his boss's facial expression, and how much paperwork he had left, he decided against giving the ever growing stack of papers another growth-spurt. Instead, he had an idea. And he needed the female, most-collected mist guardian's help for this one. Chrome was actually as strong as Mukuro and Viper combined (A/N: Yes, in this one shot, I made her OP, for two reasons, 1. Why not? It makes this fic unique! And 2. I feel like she doesn't get enough credit. So I meant for her to be completely OP and OOC, you'll see later.). Mukuro decided to leave the Vongola Famiglia, since he wasn't needed. Chrome became more independent too, allowing Mukuro to leave (she could've stopped him if she wanted to). Even so, Mukuro sometimes takes up jobs for the Vongola, and sometimes visits. Back to Takeshi...

* * *

Takeshi dragged the sled of paperwork behind him as he sprinted to the other end of the mansion, or where it used to be. There are holes in the roof because of the fight. It was also snowing, so The Vongola Mansion turned into The Vongola Winter Wonderland. It was simple reasoning, using a sled. As Takeshi arrived outside, he realized he should have gotten there sooner. There was a fire consuming the forest (Deforestation is bad! Don't do it!) behind the mansion. There were also craters in the snow and ground. All the guardians were fighting one another in an all out war. Except for Chome, silently watching on the sidelines, not making it worse, but not making it better either. "Chrome," Takeshi said with a smile, "what happened?"

Chrome nodded, acknowledging Takeshi's presence. "Well while Hibari and Mukuro started fighting, Lambo made a childish remark at Gokudera making Gokudera chuck Lambo at Hibari." Takeshi cringed,"Hibari started to attack Lambo, who had no choice but to use lightning flames, and throw grenades everywhere. Mukuro was also mad about Gokudera disturbing the fight so attacked him, while Gokudera activated Uri with Sun Flames, also activating G's Bow. Ryohei came into the picture and wanted a warm up before the New Year, so he joined the fight, now everyone's fighting against eachother." Scratch needing Chrome's help. For now. His plan was to make Chrome use illusions on the battling guardians to do the stack of paperwork, but he realized that the way he just thought up of was far more better. It included his previous plan as well.

Takeshi whispered something into Chrome's ear as she nodded, and gave mutters of, "I see.", "They deserve it.", "Great idea!", and "I can't believe you, _of all people_, would think of that!". Takeshi stood in a fighting stance with his sword out as he, in one swift, silent motion, used tranquility flames to freeze the guardians. While they were frozen in place, Takeshi and chrome laughed at the stupid stances they were in. Some of them were fighting airborne, so he had to drag them out of the morning sky, still laughing and bring them back down to the earth. Chrome used her real illusions to trap them in a cage, flame and strength proof. Then she used illusions to mentally torture them. Some of the things they saw were...

Cakey-sama

Scientology

Kawaii-Desu stuff like unicorns puking rainbows

Cat-step (dubstep with cats)

One Pregnant PewDiePie (for those of you who have not watched him on YouTube, GO WATCH HIM!)

A funeral for Retro Games

Minecraft

North Korea's airforce, all paper airplanes, made by USA

and

Clock's Saliva. (A/N: I was on a sugar high when I wrote this part.)

If that freaked you out, then you would be already fainted if their position. Although it so they can't faint, or close their eyes. Chrome still held the illusion, and Takeshi and Chrome went inside, jovially. Chrome took one fourth of the paperwork and Takeshi took one fourth of the paperwork. They decided after they both finish their paperwork (which would take a long time, one fourth was half of Takeshi's size!) they would dispel the illusion, put them into another illusion, making them do the rest of the paperwork.

The paperwork took 3 hours.

49 minutes.

and 59 seconds.

After they completed the half-stack, they dumped it all into a messy pile right outside Tsuna's office called, "FINISHED PAPERWORK". "Takeshi, do you think we should leave them in there for a while more?" Chrome asked (not so) innocently.

"I think we should let them out, they've been there long enough." Takeshi mused. Chrome huffed and muttered something about, 'We are going too soft on them...'. "But," Takeshi continued, "I would like something to eat."

"Okay, I want a huge piece of cake!" Chrome exclaimed just like a child on his or her birthday. They walked to the kitchen and stuffed themselves. They ate cake, pizza, omelets, oreos, Indian food and sweets, Chinese food, green tea, pocky (x100), and just about 60 more delicious food and sweets. "Chrome, aren't you going to get fat from all of the food?" Takeshi asked, without considering her feelings.

"People with the Mist flame don't get fat." Chrome stated. (A/N: I made that up, don't blame me I had to have and excuse!) "What about you Takeshi?"

"I workout too much to get fat." Takeshi laughed it off as Chrome sweatdropped. "Hey, there is a new Call of Duty Game that came out on the PS3, would you like to play it in the game room with me?" Takeshi inquired.

Chrome thought about it for a while. Of course she loves the game room, but she feels like she should do more paperwork. Then she thought that she did enough paperwork for a day. She felt pity for her boss. "Let's go to the game room!" She said with excitement sparkling in her eyes.

"I'll definitely kill more enemies than you this time!" Takeshi said with confidence.

"In your dreams! Your on!" Chrome accepted. Even though they were both excited to play, they both were feeling like they forgot something...

* * *

In the courtyard where the guardians, minus Takeshi and Chrome, plus Mukuro are.

*Chocking on the amount of foam that's coming out of their mouth and dropping on the snowy floor, at the same time, having having hypothermia, also bearing red, patchy skin, still watching baby unicorns being born from horses.*...

What a weird, twisted mind Chrome has...

* * *

"410 to 60?! How is that possible?!" Takeshi gaped.

"We had an hour of gameplay! How could you have gotten 1 person per MINUTE!?" Chrome gaped back at him.

"SHUT UP! It wasn't my fault! It was because of..." A torrent of excuses flowed out of Takeshi's mouth. Chrome made a bored expression while she opened and closed her hand, mocking him.

"... the fire was there, so I couldn't go forward, and I saw this one civilian being torture-..." Takeshi stopped midway as he and Chrome finally realized what they had forgotten.

"SH*T!" They both yelled and sprinted up the stairs.

* * *

Takeshi and Chrome dashed outside only to find...

Four guardians plus Mukuro passed out, despite the rule she made in her illusion to make them not pass out! Foam coaming out of their mouths and tears coming out of their eyes. Speaking of their eyes, there were red from the snow that blew in their eyes. Their skin was red from Hypothermia. And they were as cold as the Polar Ice Caps (that are now melting). "This is BAD!" Chrome bit her lip.

"No kidding, we have to get them into the nursery!" Takeshi proclaimed. Chrome dispelled her all of her illusions and made real-illusion stretchers.

The Sun-flamed docters and nurses were expecting this. They were professional docters, so they healed the four guardians in one hour. They woke up, terrified of what they just saw, but they were thirsty for revenge. They dashed out of the infirmary, and noticed the rain and mist were training with their respective weapons.

Takeshi and Chrome immediately dashed oput of the room, from sensing killer intent. That soon became into a chase. And they ended up destroying the Vongola Mansion. That irritated Neo Vongola Primo. And after he safely teseported the injured bystanders to a safe distance, he X-Burner'd the landscape around the mansion. Of course, he didn't think ahead, so he ended up doing paperwork for New Year's. What a great way to start off the year right? The guardians also had a great start. Being in the hospital was more than enough fun for them.

_This year, my resolution is to control my guaridians! _Tsuna thought.

* * *

~Owari~

* * *

A/N: I apologize for all the randomness and OOCness and the abrupt ending, the late update, etc. I don't ship 8096/TakeChrome by the way. I thought this was a funny idea, and decided to put it into action. Then it got out of hand. If you guys hated this chapter, PM me, or review, because I won't try to do anything like this ever again, ever, if you don't want me to. Also, don't forget to review about any pairing (aside from yaoi and three-sums) you want in a maybe future poll. Also review about any grammatical errors. And ideas for stories. And your overall opinion. So let's have a great year! Happy (late) New Year fanfiction fandom!

With Regards,

~Shadow-chan


	7. Lambo's True Heritage

Hello people!

A/N: I have no excuse for not updating in like, literally forever. Which I am extremely sorry for! ~(T.T)~ I did write half of another chapter for this. and it was over 6, 000 words (which is a lot for me), but then I deleted it, because it didn't really match the storyline of Katekyo Hitman Reborn! It also didn't match the upbeat personality of the fanfiction and the actual KHR manga and/or anime.  
So... Answering the ton of reviews I got last time (yes, 4 is a lot for me)! ~('u')~

RaNDoem- Thank you so much! Now I wish you (and everyone on fanfiction) a belated Easter! Time does fly! And Sorry for not updating, I most likely disappointed you and the other readers, and for that, I am truly sorry! It's a good thing that I didn't complete the "original" chapter 7, it would not have made you laugh, so phew! Thank you for reading!

w- I know right? You reviewed on... chapter 4... the one with the training and all. I thought that the end was kawaii too! Thank you for reading!

83- Thank you, O wise one, I present to you a new chapter. Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Ahhhh- Ehehehe... Sorry about that... I hope I brighten your day further, today at least!bI'm glad that this fanfiction is unique!Thank you for reading!

Again, I'm REALLY sorry! To all of you! It just hadn't came to my mind that Fanfiction . net readers were waiting for this update. Now, for what you've all been waiting for...

Chapter 7...

(it's not as epic as I thought I made it seem)

Disclaimer: Although I do own a tree, I do not own KHR.

* * *

Chapter 7:

Reborn Really is the Devil!

Lambo stretched from the red velvet couch. Yawning, he lazily stood up and wobbled caused from the aftereffects of slumber. He dragged his feet to the doorway and stopped. _What was I doing before? Why am I in a public Library? _He questioned himself looking around. Small shelves decorated the dull green walls while picture and small chapter books decorated the shelves. _The kid's section? _Lambo thought, _Why would I be here?_

Good question.

Lambo endeavored to remember what happened before only to have the memory slip away from his desperate hand. Lambo sat there for what seemed like hours, but were in fact, minutes. He attempted over and over with no avail. Lambo became frustrated. He had never have had to recall memories he was sure he never had. It terrified him. _What if I did something extremely bad and had to run? Is Tsuna and the others mad at me? Is that why I ran? The only logical thing is to head back to the masion and get answers. _Lambo mused.

Which he should not have done.

* * *

Gokudera Hayato did not want to be anywhere near that stupid cow. Well, he never did, save for special occasions such as the Varia ring battle. But now, and probably never would he ever be near that stupid cow. After he is murdered by _Reborn_, Gokudera thought of asking the head chef to make beef stew out of his remains. Gokudera knew it was a bad idea to think of that. Now he had an awful imaginary taste of human and cow meat.

He will never, ever, ever, cook that cow. Not for any sympathetic reasons such as feeling sorry for the cow, but the fact that he didn't want to stain his, Jyuudaime's, or the guardians' tongues with the bad taste of cannibalism.

Now, for his morning coffee.

* * *

Yamamoto Takeshi actually felt a little bit sorry for the cow. He had watched over him ever since he was five years old. Too bad his life had to end earlier than Yamamoto's. Well, you can't help fate, right? No use putting up a fight. Like everything else, Yamamoto laughed Lambo's suffering like it wasn't his problem. After all, he wasn't the one who _spilled Reborn's espresso all over Reborn's favorite suit_

Yamamoto wondered what Lambo's will was. He hoped that the remains of his body wouldn't be given to him. That would be troublesome. They would probably be given to Gokudera, who is somewhat like a brother to the cow. But at the same time, he kind of wanted to be given the body... The decisions. Cremated? Chopped up and eaten for good use? Thrown into a river? Buried? Hung on a stick? So many options! Now Yamamoto wanted to see all the ways he could dispose of Lambo's soon to be overkilled body. It seemed like fun.

Now, for his will...

* * *

Sasagawa Ryohei never really paid attention to the cow that always had that one high pitched cry and scream. He never had the EXTREME in him, so, he didn't really pay attention. Until he angered Master Pao Pao...

Boy, he HE knew that Lamborghini (It sounded something like a car brand, Ryohei remembered), was EXTREMELY dead. While he was running laps around the mansion, he saw Master Pao Pao in the wepons room. He looked like he was preparing an execution... with nuclear firepower. Well, Lamborghini has Ryohei's condolences.

Now, one thousand more laps to go... not bad...

* * *

Mukuro didn't think much of the stupid cow, other than that he was stupid. He was annoying, a crybaby, and even more annoying. He was also very stupid. Did he already mention that? No matter. Even after you say it a thousand times, it's still true. Mukuro was an inch away from proving his real heritage, cows. Seriously? How is that kid not a cow? He looks like a cow, acts like a cow, and is very stupid, like a cow! His boss banned the DNA tests, but Mukuro had deception and lying and illusions in his hand. Even though his boss would definitely have sensed it, Mukuro thinks his boss wouldn't care anymore.

Last time he was going into his lab, he saw Reborn there... Mukuro suspected that Reborn was getting DNA samples of the cow. Chrome actually wants to save the cow, but Mukuro was smart,and told her the cow is perfectly safe and it was just a rumor spread by one of the maids.

Now, back to the DNA samples...

* * *

Hibari Kyouya was a man of little words. All he knew was...

The annoying cow is going to be murdered.

The baby is coming up with a plan.

And that the weak should be disposed of.

That is all he has to say.

Now, back to teaching Hibird to calling him carnivore...

* * *

Tsunayoshi Sawada felt bad. But he thought Lambo could handle it... NOT.

Well, Yamamoto is going to want his dead body...

Now, back to paperwork...

* * *

As soon as Lambo came in the mansion...

Explosions happened.

Clothes flew everywhere.

Dinosaurs learned how to talk.

Clones of Lambo appeared out of nowhere.

Wait...

Dinosaurs are alive?

Maybe... Lambo is a direct descendant from the dinosaurs!

Boom. Genius.

* * *

A/N: So... How was? Bad? Terrible? That-was-so-terrible-that-I-never-ever-want-to-see-any-proof-of-your-existence-ever-again? Please give me creative ideas, I'm running out of creative juices... well okay then, hoped ya somewhat liked it!

Ciao!

Shadow-chan


	8. First Generation has a Sense of Humor!

Hey!

A/N: YAY! Three reviews! Thank you so much! I'm so happy! Answering reviews...

RaNDoem- I'm so surprised that you even REMEMBERED this story! It makes me so happy! And I (probably -_-) won't leave you guys for 5 years, hopefully! Thank you for reviewing! Any requests? ~(^.^)~

83- Thank you, for reviewing and the suggestions! I'm going to actually use one of them today! Yay! Those were great ideas and I have no idea how I didn't think of those. (-_-*) Thank you again, and you can keep requesting stories! ~(^.^)~

Aaaaah- Thank you, and I didn't know that, might as well look that up later... Thank you! Any requests? ~(^.^)~

Anyone can ask for requests, as long as there are no different pairings than how KHR ended! I would prefer comedy, but I can work with almost any genre!

Pretty short Author's Note... huh.

Please review! Any comments? Constructive criticism? Any thoughts? Any requests?

Disclaimer: I don't own anything of KHR... Not even this story plot... I got it from 83, and I bet he/she got it from someone else... The writing style is mine though. I can support at least that... But I did add a twist at the end... ehheheeheheeee...

* * *

Chapter 8:

The First Generation has a sense of Humor...

* * *

When Jyuudaime walked down the hallway, Gokudera passed it off as nothing. Jyuudaime's paperwork could be really stressful at times... Actually it was ALWAYS stressful. Gokudera wondered how he kept on living in fact...

_I will carry the burden of paperwork until Jyuudaime comes back to the office! _Gokudera resolved.

The huge double doors creaked open to reveal papers flooding the room. Gokudera kicked around the papers to see if Juudaime's chair was somewhere in this... flood.

Indeed, behing the covered desk, was the tall, red leathered chair. Although something was wrong. Not only was the chair there, but there was someone signing and completing paperwork. That unmistakable brown mop of hair... it can't be... can it?

The one and only Tsunayoshi Sawada turned around and asked the most innocent question anyone could ask in that moment in time.

"What is it Gokudera?" Tsuna asked with concern. "Is it the guardians again?" Cue the deep and long-lasting sigh the ensued, "Oh what will I do about them?"

_Five... Four... Three... Two... One! _Someone hidden behind the shadows, (A/N: And no, it's not me. Get it? It's our username... Eh... Keep reading...) counted down in his/her head. (A/N: No hints here. Keep reading.)

A high pitched scream came from seemingly nowhere, because it was so loud, came from a certain silver-haired guardian. Said guardian's ears started to bleed, and so did the sky's. After the LONG and LOUD sound ordeal was over, the sky had to call the private paramedics.

And the shadowed figure started to giggle and fade.

* * *

My ears almost bled from whatever the f**k that sound was. I decided to lay back and leave it to Tsuna.

Sasagawa-senpai suddenly started running towards him. "OIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII YAMAMOTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! DID YOU HEAR THAT EXTREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEME SOUND?"

"Sasgawa-san, you should lower your voice, it can further damage other people's ears..." I deadpanned at his 180 degree personality turn.

"It sounded like a little girl's extreme scream!" Ryohei's volume, at least, took a 180 turn. "We should go check it out! It sounded like it came from the city"

Before I could protest, I found myself being dragged so fast, I almost flew. _Wait, what city? This place is surrounded by trees for at least 63 kilometers! I bet he's just kidding around. _My inner thoughts decided.

A few hours later

I opened my groggy eyes. Wait, I slept? Since when? And HOW THE HECK ARE WE INSIDE A CITY? I glanced at the signpost. "Welcome to Orange Town! Home to the Healthiest Oranges around!" ...it says. So, not only they were in a city, they were in a city that was in...

.

.

.

NEW YORK? WHAT IS THIS MADNESS! I am the best at maps and geography out of all of the guardians, so I KNOW for a fact we are in the USA.

"Oh Yamamoto! you're awake! I tried asking these people where I ran to, but they started speaking in an exotic language. Any ideas?" Ryohei asked.

I stood up, and facepalmed. We are so screwed.

Two light, cheery and unknown voices chuckled from the grasps of darkness. Then faded, just as the first one did.

* * *

Lambo's last chance of getting those DNA samples was Rokudo Mukuro. He knew he was going to regret it if he asked, but he would regret it even more if he didn't get his revenge.

_Calm... Stay Calm..._

"Rokudo Mukuro! I require your assistance!" Lambo stated while slamming the door open.

"Kufufufufu... What is it little dinosaur?" Hibari chuckled.

_Dinosaur? What? Where did that come from? Wait... HOLY MOTHER OF DINOSAURS! IS THAT HIABRI? WAIT! THEN WHERE IS MUKURO?_

"What's wrong, weak herbivore?" Mukuro spat.

_MUKURO TOO? WAS THIS PLANNED? NO, THEY WOULD NEVER TRICK ANYONE WITH THEIR **PRIDE **ON THE LINE! THEY DON'T SEEM TO REALIZE EITHER!_

Lambo was utterly confused.

"Kufufufu... I suggest you back off skylark. He's my prey. Plus, I need his blood to recreate dinosaurs." Hibari warned with a smirk.

"I don't take orders from pineapple heads." Mukuro simply stated.

"Ohh... Is that a challange?" Hibari created his trident from mist flames.

_THIS IS DEFINITELY NOT A TRICK! AND THEY REALLY DON'T HAVE A CLUE EITHER!_

"I'll bite you to death." Mukuro slid his tonfas out of seemingly nowhere. And, of course, a fight almost destroyed the lab while Lambo ran away screaming. Not only because of the outrageous fight, also because of the fact that they switched bodies without realizing it! LAMBO WASN'T BLIND EITHER!

Three mixed laughters faded away into the darkness along with the previous three.

* * *

Chrome was trapped in an underground ditch in the Philippines. Why? She had no clue either.

She was walking to give a mission report in to the boss. Then suddenly, in a whirl of flames of color she could not describe, she ended up in here.

How does she know she's in the Philippines? Well, mist flames have a very general sense of direction. So she knows.

Well she is obviously screwed.

A womanly, unlike the last six, voice chuckled and was dragged down into the void of dark.

* * *

"Well, that was fun." Decimo concluded. "Thank you guys for all your help. The guardians needed that lesson."

The first generation all sand in unison, "You're welcome! WE would love to do it again~!"

"Just don't play tricks on ME. Just an FYI." Decimo clarified.

"You're the only one who could actually see us. How could we get anyone else's attention anyway?" Primo deadpanned at his descendant.

"True, you guys could go back to your ghostly walk around the mansion."

* * *

A/N: Sorry the last two parts seemed a bit rushed... It's just that I am a GIGANTIC FAN of One Piece. Tomorrow is Luffy's birthday. I wanted to celebrate with a fanfic. OP fans! PM me requests, if you have any!~

How was the chapter? Terrible? Well, tell me in the reviews please! Thank you!~~~

Ciao!

Shadow-chan


	9. Visit from the Varia!

Yo!  
A/N: Um... yeah... 4 months...? I don't know about you RaNDoem, but that's pretty close to 5 years... I was SO happy when I got reviews! T^T it made me so happy! Yeah, probably the main reason behind my absence is I kind of lost interest... PLEASE put down your pitchforks! Not in anime, mind you, but in KHR. Unlike One Piece, or FairyTail, KHR is over and done. And I knew it would eventually happen, but I don't have any fuel for it anymore ;-;. The only reason I still love Naruto is because Naruto is literally the complete series of my childhood. Unlike most kids in my day, watching Spongebob was not one of my hobbies. I was one of those rare species of kids who watched anime instead of anything else. Answering reviews!

cristallina- Ah! Thank you! I thought it was fun to write so I might add more of that in the future!

RaNDoem- Thank you! I just felt like I betrayed you T^T "...because nearly every other good fanfiction writer I know hasn't updated in a million years.

AT LEAST I HAVE ONE UPDATING :D"... *five million years later* here's an update!

XanetteLife- Thankk you so much! You made me cry of happiness (almost because I don't really like to cry... but if I did, you're comment would definately make me cry in joy!)! I actually really like the idea of the Varia coming over. I don't have an explanation for why I didn't think of that before, but I am writing about that right now!\

Disclaimer: I do not own KHR. Like before, I don't even own the idea of this story! It belongs to XanetteLife! So thank you for that!

Alright, let's see if I remember enough about KHR to write a whole oneshot about it!

* * *

The Varia AND Vongola's Craziness!

* * *

Xanxus didn't like paperwork. He hated it. So he always dumped it on Tsuna. Always. Then he could kick his feet out and relax. Always. But he did have to admit... The other member got a little annoying. At times... Well, most of the time... Actually, a little more than most of the time. NO, it was ALWAYS ALL the time. Squalo was yodeling or some s**t. Mammon asked everyone to pay up for the debts they owed him Lussuria flirted with any guy that he saw. Levi was asking for anything from him and it was pissing him off. Belphegor wsa trying to kill everybody who said anything, mostly Squalo. Flan of course standing there as he was a target for whoever the hell a "Bel-senpai" was (A/N: I know it's Belphegor, I thought it would be weird to make Xanxus not know who Bel-senpai was, so yeah...)

So to keep himself distracted, he did mainly four things: Eat more, complain to Tsuna, yell at the Varia members, or do no more than 30 minutes of paperwork. For him, that was like 50 pages. At least he did more than 1 per minute... Sometimes. Meanwhile Tsuna had more than 500 stacks each day. He wasn't nice enough to take some of the load off of him. So he did 50 maybe... once a week? Yeah, that was about it. He was kind of surprised Tsuna didn't get arthritis. Not like he cared about his health. Nobody cared about his health. Not even his guardians. His guardians destroyed the mansion and injured people on a daily basis. If they truly cared for their boss, then they wouldn't destroy the mansion so often.

Xanxus was bored. And when he was bored, he would do one of the main things on his list of four "distractions". Today, he wanted to bother Tsuna.

"SHUT UP YOU S**THEADS, WE'RE GOING TO THE MAIN MANSION." The Varia was silent... And then they went their separate ways towards the same place, not saying a word.

Xanxus also had mission reports to turn in, so it would be a win-win for him if he got to complain and hand in reports. Actually it would be like a win-don't-care-never-will-care situation. Whatever, he'll just bring it anyway.

* * *

"OIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII! IT'S THE VONGOLA MANSION." (A/N: I think everyone can guess who that was.)

"Squalo? Perfect! I can practice my new baseball pitch!" Yamamoto mused. "Oi! Squalo! come over here!"

Squalo pretended not to hear. Or couldn't hear because of the sound of his own voice. "OIIIIIIIIII IS THERE ANYONE INTERESTING HERE! NOBODY! I'LL GO BACK TO VARIA QUARTERS!"

As he turned around, he was met by a blue flame coated blade. "Hi Squalo! Wanna play a game?"

"NO!"

"Please? I promise it will rid you of bordem?"

"UNLESS IT INCLUDES FIGHTING, I'M NOT-"

"If it will include fighting depends on you."

"OKAY I'M IN!"

Yamamoto smirked in victory, "Alright then, follow me!"

At the training room... "Alright, just try to hit this ball," Yamamoto held the ball up. "don't use your flames though!" Yamamoto took his pitching stance. A serious expression flashed across his face. Yamamoto threw the ball (A/N: I'm sorry I can't elaborate on the throwing part, but I don't know much about baseball...) the ball started to spazz out in wild direction, even though it was stil going forward. Squalo unsheathed his sword, and sliced the ball cleanly in half, moving nothing but his arm.

Suddenly, Yamamoto had a vein pulsing through his forehead. His brows were furrowed. And a frown was spread on his face. "That was my.. LUCKY baseball. You will get the fight you wanted. But this time I will slaughter you." (A/N: In my opinion, Chrome influenced him a bit too much.)

And the whole left side of the mansion was destroyed.

* * *

Chrome was busy delivering paperwork to her boss. Mammon walked right in front of her and boldly asked, "Where's that Mukuro." Not even a question. A statement.

"Mukuro-sama and Hibari-san are on a mission right now. So, he'll be back next week, considering how "well" he works with Hibari-san." Chrome politely answered.

"This is bull. I don't get paid enogh to talk to you. Or even be here." Mammon turned away.

Chrome started to walk away. But before she did, she heard Mammon's cries while he dreamt of Cakey-sama, Scientology, Kawaii-Desu stuff like unicorns puking rainbows, Cat-step, One pregnent Markiplier (- Awesome youtuber), A funeral for Retro Games, Minecraft, North Korea's airforce; paper planes made by the USA, and Clock's saliva. An evil grin spread across her face.

* * *

"Kyokugen, kyoukugen, kyokugen~" Ryohei hummed as he delivered paperwork to the Tenth.

"Ryohei-kun~ Where are you my sweetpea~?" Sang a flirtatious voice.

Ryohei spent the rest of he day running and hiding.

"I HAVE A WIFE!" He shouted occasionally. "PLUS I'M STRAIGHT LIKE A REAL BOXER!"

Lussuria only chased with more vigor whenever he said that.

* * *

Lambo miraculously slept peacefully as all of this happened.

Until Levi barged into the room.

"HEY YOU COW OR DINOSAUR OR WHATEVER!"

"Is it morning all ready? No... I'm going to tell myself that it's night..."

"BOSS TOLD ME TO GO FIGHT ONE OF THE GUARDIANS."

"I think Gokudera's free..." Lambo mumbled.

"Also, I'm not sorry for almost killing you when you were five."

The tension was so thick that you could cut i with a butter knife. "So," Lambo unpinned one of his famous grenades. "you want to see how I've improved?"

And the Northeast side of the mansion blew up along with Lambo's sanity.

* * *

Gokudera was delivering all the paperwork that he had to deliver, plus Ryohei's part to deliver. He almost collapsed from the weight. Little did he know that...

BOOM went the hallway!

... Belphegor stole one of his bombs, lit it, and hid it in the stack of paper work.

Pissed off Gokudera did not want to deal with selfish blondie self-proclaimed prince right now.

Solution: Destroy target.

Whelp, there goes the Southeast part of the mansion.

* * *

"I swear on my name as tenth I will murder you and the rest of the Varia if you guys don't help out with my paperwork. Except for Chrome and Ryohei, they did nothing wrong. The rest of you. Help or I will stain these gloves with blood."

Guess who said that?

You guessed right, it was Neo Vongola Primo! Your prize is to do half of the paperwork he gets on a daily basis! Congratulations!

* * *

And, DONE!

A/N: Thank you for reading! Hoped you enjoyed! I'm sorry if I got something incorrect here. It's just that I haven't watched KHR in a long time, so please tell me if I did anything wrong!It's also the reason I didn't write all too much for anyone, I was too afraid I would get something wrong. I took a risk with Yamamoto, but I really didn't like taking a risk, so that's about it. -.- I know I'm sad. Anyway! Thank you! As always, please leave requests! I would love to do them!

With regards,

Shadow-chan


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